Serena Writes a Poem (and Guess What It's About)

Serena has posted a new poem on her website. And it's about Serena's favorite subject. "Me me me me me me......."

An excerpt:

I love to act
I love to play tennis
I love to design
I dream of people watching me holding up my third Wimbledon trophy
I dream of people watching me on the big screen in movie theaters
I dream of having every person owning at least 1 piece of my Aneres designs.
I dream
I dream not only at night
I dream during the day
When I want things to go right
What type of dreams make sense?

Most of all I dream of being a good person to all that are inspired by me
I dream of having girls, women, boys, men being fond of not only what I
have done on the tennis court, or on the big screen or what I design but
I dream of what people think of me as a person.
I dream that people think of me as a giving person as a person that
loves life and is fun to be around.
I dream

We hope this poem isn't Serena's version of Martin Luther King's I Have a Dream Speech. Note how Serena's idea of inspiring the masses includes giving of herself so we can all see her on the big screen, or with her "designs". 

We could write a dissertation on the crap Serena is plastering all over her website. Sports psychologists tell athletes to use visualization to achieve their goals. But this is not quite what they meant. In order to get that trophy in your hands there's a process you must go through. It's a process called work. This is a concept that Serena has always struggled with. She wants to be No. 1 but refuses to put in the hours to make that dream come true. 

Serena is the defending Australian Open champion. What last year's tournament proved, yet again, is that Serena could be the greatest player to play women's tennis... If she works at it. If she doesn't, she will never measure up to Justine Henin. Those words must chill her to the bone. The truth's a bitch.

In case you haven't guessed, Serena will get nothing but tough love from this space. 

(Photo courtesy Richard Winchell. Some rights reserved.)

Meet Your Moderators

The dynamic duo known as CYCLOPS will be calling the lines around here. 

BUDDHA

Likes:  Russian Tennis.

Dislikes:  Everything else.

SHADOW

Likes:  Catnip-laced tennis balls.

Dislikes:  Mean people and dogs.

Serena Wants to Know Who Moved Her Cheese

Although the tennis doping and betting scandals contributed to the genesis of this blog, it was Serena Williams' official website that finally pushed me over the edge. Serena's blog is full of fascinating discourses on bad relationships and tips for leading a better life. 

You see, Serena read a book last fall that changed her life! It was Spencer Johnson's Who Moved My Cheese. When Serena analyzed her career and life she finally figured out she was on the the wrong path. She had an epiphany: 

I was afraid I was afraid to find new cheese! I thought there was only one cheese out there but after reading that book I realized that there is all types of "cheese" out there. Now I am not talking about real cheese but cheese is whatever you make it to be. Whether or not its money, or boyfriends, or friends. There is always more out there if what u have around, Ok I hope I am not boring you guys, but after reading this book my whole spirit and my whole life changed. I became a different person. My personal life as well as my tennis life improved. And all I do now is laugh! I love to live and laugh! It is awesome!

Books are awesome indeed. We at Counter-Punch still think the best way to move your cheese around tends to be through hiring a personal trainer and busting your ass. Tune in to the Aussie Open to see what kind of cheese arranging Serena got done over the winter.

This Blog's For You

I have toyed with becoming a blogger for a couple of years now. But two things always stopped me. First, I saw how narcissistic most blogs are and I resolved not to join the community of navel-gazers gabbing about their breakfast cereal. I'm self-centered enough as it is - I don't need a blog to further inflate my importance to the human race.

 

Second, although I always have plenty to say, I was conflicted about whether my opinions, in all their impassioned, rational glory, were important enough to be heard. Over the years I've tended to rely on the rule of thumb I developed back in law school, when I was forced to listen to law students who loved nothing more than the sound of their own voice:  In those days of total agony punctuated by tennis and the occasional donut, I resolved to volunteer in class only when I had something new to offer, or when the entire class was missing the point. 

Blogs can be annoying, but they have also proved immensely useful as counterpoints to the mainstream media, as well as outlets for discussion and debate. Sports blogs are just now coming into their own. They are needed for the same reason we need them in politics, to challenge media insiders by providing a perspective that isn't tainted by journalists who need access or have an axe to grind.

Tennis is woefully under-covered in the US.  Few American newspapers have regular tennis writers anymore. The AP's tennis articles are pathetic recitations of scores and boring quotes. Sports news here is dominated by one entity, ESPN, and that makes things even worse because tennis is often bashed by the four-letter even while the network tries to be the place for tennis on tv. Tennis journalism is dominated by a few personalities. Some are good, some are bad (and you'll be hearing about them soon), but it concerned me to see the four-letter merge with Tennis magazine late last year. Every time a deal like that gets done it's negative for the tennis fan. Do we really need another outlet for Peter (B)dodo?

When necessary, I will be this sport's biggest cheerleader. When it is wronged by the media I will bash the bashers. When something sensational happens you'll hear about it. But I won't sugarcoat things either. When women's tennis is sucking rotten eggs, I'll be talking about it. We're going to dish it up raw. 

So tennis fans, this blog's for you. I've followed and played tennis for as long as you have and you deserve a critical analysis of matches, news and hot-button issues. That's what this blog will be. And all served up with a wicked slice of gossip.

First set. Muze to serve.